#ASHLLYDFIT - A NEW FOUND FITNESS JOURNEY

Welcome to a self-taught fitness journey; to become a lean, toned and stronger woman.

I have never been a size 8 and I am happy with that. I don't remember a time that I stood on the scales and weighed in anything less than 10 stone either, but I am happy with that too. 

I remember when we moved to the area that I live in now and had to register at a doctor's surgery. I think I was around the 12/13 age mark and I remember having a routine checkup upon registration. My blood pressure was taken and my weight. I specifically remember the nurse looking a little apprehensive and asking me to step outside whilst she spoke to my mum. I knew what she was telling my mum. That I was overweight and needed to start shifting some weight. 

Back then, I felt huge because I was made to feel like I was huge. I went through years of bullying through both primary and secondary school, being called 'fat' and 'chubby'. As a young girl growing up, this is incredibly damaging and I felt so unhappy in the skin I was in. Looking back now? I was a 15 year old, size 10 young woman, with bigger boobs than my friends and curves which my friends hadn't yet developed. Yet, it was drummed into me that I was fat. 

I also really hope the nurse has either retired or been educated a little better on what should be labelled as 'overweight'. I also wish these people from my schooling life would stop trying to add me on Facebook.

I have been recently body shamed on social media by fellow bloggers and I am ashamed and embarrassed. If you feel the need to shoot people down for the way the look, please stop. It was quite clear to myself and other people that these girls are so insecure about themselves. The only way to make themselves feel better about being unhappy in their own bodies, is to laugh about somebody else's. 

I have posed in underwear on my blog because I am a confident 24 year old woman. This doesn't make me "trashy", nor does it make me an "attention seeker" or any of the other vile things people have said about me. I fucking love my curves. I love my boobs. I do have a love/hate relationship with my stomach, but it's a part of me and I accepted that years ago. I don't shy away from showing and writing about what I love, so why is my body any different? 

Lingerie brand collaborations are my favourite and I am so proud that brands notice me for how confident I am with my body. 

We are all born naked into the world and spend the majority of our younger years running around naked. We all got changed into P.E clothes at school in front of each other and all had to climb into swimming costumes/shorts for our best friend's birthday party. We all take our clothes off at the end of the day and we all get up close and personal with someone we are about to sleep with. We all bathe with no clothes on and get undressed in shop's changing rooms. We all prance about in bikinis and swimming trunks whilst on holiday and we are all undressed by strangers when we die. 

There is nothing wrong with being naked and there is certainly nothing wrong in covering up your intimate parts and embracing the rest. 

I have been eating clean and going to the gym 5 times a week for about 5 weeks, but I don't restrict myself with food. I still treat myself to a bit of chocolate every now and then and it's important to remember that is what makes up a balanced diet. I also haven't drank diet coke for 6 months. I mostly always drink water now and have seen an incredible difference in my skin and energy levels. 

When I stepped on the scales 2 weeks ago, I had put 5 pounds on and was horrified and very baffled as to what I was doing wrong. However, I now realise this is my body building muscle, as I have started seeing visible changes to my body. I have since lost that 5 pounds again, which I should imagine is me losing body fat whilst building muscle.

There's 4 weeks difference between these two photos. My legs are more muscular and my stomach is somewhat flatter. I've been working my arse off in the gym; usually spending 2/2.5 hours in there per day. Now the hard work is starting to show and it makes me more determined to keep going.

What do I want from the gym?

I am honestly not really interested in losing weight, which is why I concentrate more on weight training than hitting up the treadmill for an hour. A mistake so many people make who want to build muscle.

Whilst I sit on the scales at double numbers, I know this is a mix of having bigger boobs, hips, a bum; and now muscle.  I think the biggest mistake that a person can make is obsessing over numbers. I don't rush to the scales after every workout. In fact, I weigh myself only a few times per year. 

Numbers don't mean anything and this is SO important to remember. Being a size 12 on top is considered "plus size", which absolutely baffles me. Having bigger boobs means I can't quite slide into those size 10 tops as much I probably could do if my DD's were B's instead. I'm a true size 12 in bottoms, because I have a butt. However, I have some bottoms that are size 10s and some size 12s are too big for me. The UK sizing is all over the place lately which is why I don't obsess over it. I know that I don't fit into Topshop Mom jeans and H&M jeans are too small for me; even at a size 16! 

Outrageously ludicrous. 

I have wanted to start a fitness section on my blog for ages, so this is the first instalment. I will probably update every month with progress, so it will be interesting to look back and see how far I have come. 

I have a long term goal in mind and I know it will take a couple of years to get there. However, with my dedication to the gym and a balanced diet, I know I will get there eventually. So, watch out for my next lingerie blog post - there's loads more coming for sure and I can't wait to rock it.