WORKING OUT WHY HE CAN'T GET IT UP

26/04/2017


So many taboo subjects are widely talked about nowadays and many people don't shy away from talking about their own personal experiences. However, the one thing I didn't know very much about until now and something I haven't seen many people talk about, is Erectile Dysfunction.

Where does Erectile Dysfunction fit in with my blog? The truth is it technically doesn't. I'm a woman with a vagina, who has a majority of other vaginas (theoretically speaking) who reads this blog. However, sometimes you have to use your audience, your voice, your influence and your power to spread the message and importance of certain problems, that just are not being spoken about.

Question 1. 
How many of you lovely ladies have been hot under the covers, seconds from being struck by his beef thermometer; only for it to go from 30 degrees right down to -5 in seconds? Well, in my personal sexual experiences, this has happened so many times. Me being a woman, I question myself and whether it's me. Does he fancy me? Has he gone off my body? Did my lady lumps make him almost repeat his lunch? Did he stop because he's thinking about his ex? 

Erectile Dysfunction is more common than you think, yet we don't associate it as a genuine health problem first hand.


What is it?
Erectile Dysfunction or impotence is explained by Online Doctor LloydsPharmacy. They explain it to simply be the inability to achieve and maintain an erection. This can be during masturbating or having sex. With some men, it may happen once or twice in their lives; but for some men, it can be an ongoing problem.

Why does it happen?
Whilst it can be down to the fact there is low sexual attraction on his part, it's probably very unlikely to be anything to do with that. An erection is caused by the rush of the blood to the penis, so impotence is the actual thinning of the blood vessels in his trouser snake.

It's a regular and normal thing to happen, but if the problem is an ongoing thing, then it's advised to see a doctor. Questions will be asked and the guy will be examined, which puts most guys off from booking that doctor's appointment. It's an embarrassing thing to talk about, hence the stigma around the subject. However, it's so important to get checked for later problems that could occur.

Problems such as high blood pressure, high cholesterol and diabetes are all linked to the failure of being able to maintain an erection. Psychological causes that are linked are anxiety, depression, stress and low sexual desire. There's a lot more to the problem than just not being able to "get it up".


I spoke to my 25 year old friend recently about his personal experiences with erectile dysfunction. He doesn't have a girlfriend but has an active sex life. He recently lost an erection during sex and told me that immediately the girl asked if it was because he didn't find her attractive. He admitted that he doesn't achieve erections in the mornings as much as he did as a teenager and erections depend on his alcohol level and how sexually attracted he is to the girl.

He told me he has used Viagra in the past and it helped him to last longer during sex and stay erect for longer. I asked him if he's ever been to the doctor about losing erections in the past and why he thinks most men shy away from doing so. He told me that it's a touchy subject that is not enjoyable to learn or read about. He added that most men feel embarrassed and ashamed to talk to a doctor; especially if it's a female doctor.

What can solve the problem?
Medication is available to reduce the blood pressure, but a man will need to see a doctor before hand, prior to being prescribed drugs. Other problem solvers include the infamous Viagra drug which are used to help a man "last longer" during sex. Other options include vacuum pumps and sex therapy for couples. 

It's a weird subject to write about and a funny one to talk about; but it has made me think twice when it comes to not only having those burning over thinking questions during sex; but to accept that sometimes a man just can't help it. 

Disclaimer: In collaboration with Lloyds Pharmacy. All words are my own. Images are royalty free stock images. 

34 comments

  1. Wonderful post about what can be a delicate subject! You're right .. there are so many different things that could be happening. So many times men don't think to talk with their doctor .. it could be a medical issue.

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  2. Anonymous26/4/17

    I have to say, you've handle a post on a sensitive subject very well. :)

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  3. A very well written post. The best is to be supportive if it happens to a partner, stress will not help.

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  4. You know what, I was just going to skip over this but this was so well-written, it made me laugh and educated me at the same time, so thank you! Using your influence to spread some important info AND make people giggle is definitely worth it in my opinion.

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  5. When I saw the title I was a little bit like 'oh', but this is so well written and oh my god, I loved it! I actually learned so much through it and it's important to discuss those kind of topics - such a good post :)

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  6. I think it's great that you're talking about this as it is common. And even guys without it can lose the odd erection every now and then, and most of the time it has nothing to do with levels of attraction, I find tiredness can have a lot to do with it. If my other half is really really tired it can affect things x

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  7. Great post about a quite often delicate subject. Very funny too! x

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  8. I think you handled this post really well, not an easy topic to talk about

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  9. I was with someone who suffered with erectile dysfunction and went through what you went through - does he actually like me etc. The drugs provided didn't help unfortunately though.

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  10. Great post for the guys and dealt with a great deal of tact...not an easy topic to write on, well done you :) x

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  11. A very add topic to talk about especially when your not the one experiencing it. But you covered it very well and sensitively. X

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  12. i really commend you to do this post, well done, such an important topic that no one wants to talk about!

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  13. So glad people can actually talk about sex, penis and vagunas, we all have them! I was a bit surprised to see in on my time like, but I'm glad I did! Well done girl, it's super informative and so well written! Well done xoxo

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  14. Its happened to me before and I too questioned whether it was because they didn't find me attractive. But your right EDD is more common than we think and we should make men feel more comfortable about it which puts less pressure on them to perform.

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  15. This is a well written article. Such an important topic, that should be talked about more.

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  16. This is a very delicate subject to write about and I think that you have covered it extremely well.

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  17. angela milnes27/4/17

    What an Interesting topic I think this is not a easy topic especial for those sensitive.

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  18. I think that a man is suffering with erectile dysfunction he needs to seek help at his local gp. There's no shame in it and there are ways to treat it.

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  19. Anonymous28/4/17

    I love your terminology of meat thermometer! lol. But yes, I can never see why if men do have problems they shy away from medical help. It's not a shameful thing to have happen, and the stress it causes when it does happen often makes it a reoccurring problem because of that fear.

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  20. there is so many taboo topics that people just don't feel comfortable about discussing but they really do need to. I think if more people where open and honest there would be a lot more people who would get help for their problem instead of ignoring it and being embarrassed by it

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  21. Such a well written post, its something thats very important that needs to be discussed

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  22. Such an interesting post! It's definitely too easy to blame yourself when something like this happens but it's important to remember that there are SO many other potential reasons!!

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  23. Great thing to write about. It is weird that subjects like this or female incontinence get hushed... When it happens quite commonly!

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  24. I really enjoyed reading this blog as it really isn't something that people talk about. I can imagine the pain and embarrassment that it would cause for both the male and his partner. Well done for talking about such taboo subject

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  25. This was a super interesting and insightful post. I didn't realize it affected so many men.

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  26. It's a great post, and you write in such a humorous way, think we've all been there at one time or another.

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  27. I actually think this is a great topic to write a post about!! You're right its untalked about becauae its stigmatised Unfortunately but so great you're raising awareness and giving knowledge on it!

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  28. Great topic I haven't experienced this myself as been with the same partner for many years, but I know a couple older than me that had these problems and it caused her to have an affair because he wouldn't get any help. It's a shame when men won't go and get these things checked out.

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  29. This is a great post on a subject that definitely doesn't get the coverage it deserves. Such a common thing and yet we class it as taboo or men are made to feel like a failure, I've been in the situation where alcohol has affected a mans ability multiple times, it happens

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  30. This is a really informative post around the subject, another 'taboo' subject tackled successfully by a blogger!

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  31. Such a well written post. Sometimes these things need to be talked about

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  32. I think the more people that talk about subjects like this the better. It shouldn't be taboo.

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  33. what a well written post and very informative too , thank you for sharing and highlighting this , its not all that much of the taboo that people think it is x

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  34. such a good post, i think girls instantly think its us but sometimes its just a normal thing which happens for men xo

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